LOVING THROUGH DISAGREEMENT

Thank you for your comments on last week’s reflection on reformation in The United Methodist Church. The many posts and emails I received in response to the reflection revealed a love of our church and a deep hunger for it to be all it can be amid a fracturing time. Where there is brokenness, there is a need for healing—there must be a time for rest and recovery as that which is broken is reformed. With the help of the Holy Spirit, the people called United Methodist will be a church of reformation as the broken pieces are stitched together in new and beautiful ways.

Can we sit in the rest and healing part for a moment?

My hunch is that you—like me—are sick and tired of the half-truths, mistruths, and just plain lies that have been said about our beloved church. I regularly get emails from folks across the connection saying that their church is considering disaffiliation because they were told I don’t believe in the divinity of Christ and that I use Tarot cards to make decisions in my annual conference. Both are false! And I give thanks for those folks who took it upon themselves to do a little research and seek out the facts.

I do have critiques about our church. There are things I wish were different. Some decisions pain me deeply. But disagreement is a part of living in community. I have yet to belong to a community that was free from dissenting voices. What matters is how we enter into the disagreements as we embrace a mutual desire to make our shared life better.

One thing I recognized early on as a pastor was that our appointment system makes it much too easy to leave a church (or for a church to request a new pastor) when the going gets rough. What I learned was that this doesn’t bring resolution, it simply delays an honest engagement of the disagreements. When all parties stay close, leaning in together, keeping aware of their commonalities instead of their differences, it helps move through the disagreement. We learn so much together! When we truly seek to move through our differences and stay united, we are all brought through the conflict to a whole (and holy) place of mutuality and trust. And it is from that place that great things can happen as we seek to serve as disciples of Christ!

(Image by Gerd Altmann)

I believe that God works even in the discord, for “in all things God works for good.” May we stay open-hearted to those with whom we disagree, for the Body of Christ is a diverse one and we need each other in order to know God as fully as we can. May love be the guide in all we do, in every ministry we undertake, in every decision we ponder; a love that enlarges our world, our views, our understandings, because this love requires us to take into account not only ourselves and those close to us, but even those we see as “other” and “strange” yet still possess the image of God.

May love undergird our life in Christ’s church as we seek to be faithful stewards of it.

Reformation and The United Methodist Church

I recently had an interview with Yellowstone public radio. The interviewer, Kay Erickson, wanted to ask me questions about the current events in The United Methodist Church. I steeled myself for her questions but then was delightfully caught off guard by her first question:

“What can you say about the reformation happening in The United Methodist Church?”

“Reformation”. I like that.

Her question had me exploring the meaning of reformation. One source describes it as “improvement (or an intended improvement) in the existing form or condition of institutions or practices etc.; intended to make a striking change for the better in social or political or religious affairs.” Synonyms for reformation include “improvement”, “betterment”, “correction”.

Instead of “split”, “schism”, or “disaffiliation”, what if we saw this moment in the life of The United Methodist Church as a reformation moment?

If we were honest with one another, we would note that it is time for a reformation. While the Gospel message of love of God and neighbor hasn’t changed, the world around us has. Our communities are filled with “Nones” (those who have had no encounter with the Church) and “Dones” (those that have left for a variety of reasons, including spiritual trauma). In fact, the “Dones” have increased in numbers as studies show that church attendance has dropped off since COVID. How we share this life-saving, life-transforming love of God in Jesus Christ needs reforming in order to reach people outside the walls of our church.

Imagine a church where all people in your community can call home, receive a welcomed embrace, and find encouragement and strength for the challenges they face.

Imagine a church that sees new people as a gift from God, who possess skills and life experiences that can enrich our common life.

Imagine a church that is a community hub, where people come for learning, recovery, recreation, and creating change.

Imagine worship opportunities that are on days and times other than Sunday mornings, so that people can receive spiritual nourishment and a faith community when they most need it.

Imagine a church that centers those lives that the rest of the world shoves to the margins.

Imagine a church where bible study is intrinsically related to service and acts of justice in the world.

Imagine a church that is less interested in building and ministry maintenance and instead with how to best be organized to meet the needs of a hurting world?

Imagine a church whose connective tissue isn’t the building but the strength of the community.

Imagine a church that is always open to the Holy Spirit’s leading, allowing itself to change in order to remain faithful.

I am ready to engage in the work of reformation. How about you?

Journeying with the Magi

This is the Sunday when we remember when the Magi, with a sense of urgency, journeyed from the East. They followed the star, traveling first to Jerusalem and then on to Bethlehem, seeking to encounter the Christ Child.

While they were in Jerusalem, they came to Herod and stated their intentions to find this one called the king of the Jews. Herod feared this news but feigned a reverent interest in the baby, stating that he wanted the Magi to return to him after they had located the baby.

But the Magi listened to a message that came to them in a dream: don’t go back to Herod. They went home by a new road as they sought to distance themselves from a second encounter with Herod. By avoiding Herod, they kept Jesus alive. Herod was so threatened by the baby Jesus that he on to murder all the baby boys in Bethlehem

Our dreams can startle us in their clarity, pointing us to a direction we hadn’t intended to take.

Where do your dreams lead you?

Are you willing to step out on a journey that has no clear map, trusting that you will be guided by the Spirit to a place that is both transformative and life-giving?

By taking the unfamiliar road, what will be saved? Perhaps this is a question we most overlook when we are challenged to change direction. We keep looking back at what we will lose. But our actions—like the Magi—have the capacity to bring life to others in ways we can’t even imagine.

Journey with the Magi to encounter the Christ Child. Bring what gifts you can offer. Then, rise from your knees and take the path that will offer you—and others—life!

WALKING INTO 2023

2022 has not been an easy year. Divisions seem to have deepened and multiplied. Civility is in short supply. It feels like anger, mistrust, and disinformation guide personal and communal actions. We’ve grown accustomed to war and rumors of war. We have stopped seeing the image of God in some faces. Heartbreak crowds the corners of our heart, nudging out joy.

Looking at the blank slate of the New Year, I wonder what it will hold for you and me. When will a sunset create a deep pang so poignant that catches in our throat? What call will we receive in the middle of the night? How will joy well up so fast it will surprise us, and beauty suddenly appear and take our breath away? What strangers will become friends? What will we learn that will inform how we live for the rest of our lives? When and where will love blossom unbidden?

As I look for a word to guide my steps into the uncharted map of 2023, I found this section of I Peter from the First Nations Version of the New Testament:

Walk side by side in harmony with each other. Try to feel what others feel. Love each other as
family. Be tenderhearted and walk with a humble spirit.

Never return evil for evil or insult for insult. Instead, speak words of blessing over each other, for you were chosen to share together in the Creator’s blessings. (I Peter 3: 8-9)

I receive the gift of these words from the Holy Spirit and will hold fast to them each day. I don’t think they will keep hardships at bay, but I do believe that they will make the way through hardships clearer. Grounded in Jesus’ way of love, I pray that my walk in 2023 will be one of gentleness and tenderness, caring for the earth and others as best I can.

What words will guide your steps into 2023?

MY JOB IS TO LOVE

 Last week, I worshipped with FUMC Prairie Campus in Colorado Springs (CO). It was a somber day as the impact of the shootings at ClubQ continued to reverberate across the community. Following the service, Robin and I stopped to look at the memorial that had been created at ClubQ. Rainbow flags, bouquets of flowers, prayer cards and signs had been left in front of large pictures of the five people who had lost their lives in the shooting. The cries of people weeping were the only sound that pierced the silence as folks came to pay their last respects.

One sign left a deep impression on me was a black poster board with white letters: MY JOB IS TO LOVE. In the face of hate and death, the power of those words hit me hard and I have been pondering them all week.

We are in the season of Advent. Each Sunday is a chance for us to focus our waiting on the coming of Christ. The second Sunday of Advent’s focus is Love. We are reminded of a God who loved us enough to become one of us.

Through his teaching, Jesus makes love the center over and over again. He reminds his followers that all of the law can be summed up in two things: Love God and love others. He shows us what love looks like by standing with those on the margins, by being a healing presence, by pushing back on oppressive forces. Love, for Jesus, is an action verb that compels us to act when there is suffering, wrong-doing, and prejudice. In this way, our love of God is made visible in the world.

As we face a world where hate is paraded in the public square, where violence seems to have the upper hand, where we wonder if God has abandoned us, take time this week to ponder the Christmas miracle: Emmanuel, God-With-Us! Make God’s presence known to those around you through the love you share. Live the truth that is found in the familiar song: They will know we are Christians by our love.

Your job is to love.

Make this your aim. In everything you do, ask yourself, “Does this action, is what I am saying, increasing love in the world? Is it a visible sign of my love of God and neighbor?”

As you move through Advent, with your eye on the Christmas gift of love, keep practicing grounding all you do in love. And watch your world change.

Potlucks and Prayers

Every time I refresh my newsfeed, I learn of more churches across our United Methodist connection who have left the denomination. I confess that this breaks my heart that we in The United Methodist Church cannot find a way to witness to the world how to find unity in the midst of diversity.

I believe that theological diversity has been a strength of Methodism. Wesley built into the Methodist movement communal accountability along with personal holiness. This did not mean that everyone thought the same but instead found deepening spirituality through holy conferencing, utilizing scripture, tradition, experience and reason. We, too, find our faith growing when we are in holy conversation with those who think differently from us but whom we nonetheless understand are being faithful.

However, when we make pronouncements against others, simply because of who God created them to be, without engaging in relationship to see how God may be moving in another’s life, we harm them and we harm the body of Christ. Certainly, this is what has happened in our denomination. The truth of God’s claim and call on lgbtq+ people’s lives has been rejected, not because of the fruits of the Spirit that may or may not be evident, but simply because of who they/we are.

Relationships matter. It is why there is incredible diversity in our pews. I have never been in a church where everyone agreed on everything. Each person, being a unique child of God, brings their own experiences of God, their own expression of faith, and their own orientation as to how that is expressed to the church community. We don’t vote the same way. We don’t watch the same news. We don’t feel the same way on a myriad of issues. But in relationship as a church community, we have committed ourselves to loving one another.

I have come to see that our pulpits and pews are places where differences of opinion are overcome by prayer and potlucks. These open us up to the reality of lives that are not like our own. We learn of heartache and triumphs of others and take them into our hearts as we lift them up to God. We delight in passing plates piled with favorite family food. We recognize that we have more in common than we thought.

To those who feel God is calling them to leave the denomination, I am holding you in prayer. May your ministry be blessed as you follow the leading of the Holy Spirit.

To those who remain, I am so glad you are here. We need you. We need your unique, God-given self. We need the perspective on life and faith that only you can bring to enrich our shared life and ministry. We need to learn of the ways God has touched your life, forever changing you as you deepen your discipleship. In this way, we all are touched, changed, and blessed.

So let’s take hands and pray together. And then, let’s pass the food and enjoy the feast of community God sets before us!

GRACE AND FORGIVENESS

I recently read an article that quoted NYC pastor Rev. Michael Keller: “We’ve become less of a forgiving culture.”

Everywhere we turn, we see the truth of this statement. Fuses are short. Tempers are hot. Our willingness to assume good intentions even when another’s action might have unintended consequences that inconvenience or confuse us is getting thinner and thinner.

Civility seems lost as we see fights over food in grocery stores, battles over parking spots, and pushes and shoves when a simple “excuse me” would suffice.

Is civility in short supply, or is it grace?

Grace and forgiveness are intimately entwined. We United Methodists believe that grace abounds in God’s love for us. So wide and generous is God’s grace that it goes ahead of us, inviting us into a deeper experience of it.

Have we really experienced this grace, freely and abundantly given to us? How has this grace informed how we move in the world? Do we seek to be a grace-filled people, our lives a witness to God’s grace?

Each week, we pray together the Lord’s Prayer. Every. Single. Week. This prayer includes, “forgive us our trespasses (debts/sins) as we forgive those who have trespassed against us.” (Matthew 6:12). How well are we offering forgiveness to others? Could it be that our inability to open ourselves up to the power of grace is limiting us in our ability to forgive?

This weekend, the clergy of the conference met together. We acknowledged the difficult season we have been in, how COVID stretched us, denominational angst stressed us, and feelings of inadequacy plagued us as we considered the limits of our leadership in this time.

We needed to feel the reality of grace. And we needed the power of forgiveness. We needed not only to forgive others, we needed to forgive ourselves. There were tears and there were sighs too deep for words as we prayed silently and together. We reminded ourselves of God’s grace that assures us that we are forgiven.

May you, too, spend time in prayer with God. Let go of the guilt you are feeling and feel God lightening your load through the power of forgiveness.  May the grace your experience be poured out in the world, increasing kindness and compassion in a world that has forgotten how to forgive.